Reality Check

Life sometimes seems like this constant obsession with the future, reality is- if it’s meant to be it will and if it’s not it won’t… No amount of wanting or sensationalizing or worrying will change that. You can’t change yourself or try to rush into it with the goal of finding ‘the one’ Cause then it all becomes something you are trying to create or reinvent instead of something that is real. I think we all like the idea of it all, of what we need to be, or what we see something as potentially being- instead of seeing what it is… Or letting things unfold, one day at a time. Relationships are complicated, but ultimately it comes down to- can me being me and you bein you work out? Can we handle each other / care when the others at their worst …. It seems like many relationships these days go through this constant “ok I owe you this because you did this for me” instead of naturally wanting each other to be happy, we choose to ignore the truth, we want to change ourselves and we want to change our partner, I guess people often times want things to work instead of seeing what it is. The problem I think with most relationships is too much stacking cards and trying to gain this false sense of worth with a synbol or a gift; very little “I did this because I want to…” or “I got you this because I thought it was something you would like…” It’s this constant see-saw / balancing act to make sure everything is even, everything is fair. Everyone wants to be loved, important, needed, we fail to acknowledge what’s real and what’s artificial, getting too caught up in how we think it could be, how we envision it being, imagining the final outcome or the ultimate goal of where we see ourselves- trying to put all the pieces together at the same time, instead of taking it day to day with what it is.. It’s this race against time, I feel very similar too a lot of times, what someone thinks etc. Many of these ideals are all things that I really need to do anyway (and want to) and making strides to do it asap, but I often wonder If I would feel the intense pressure internally or because of what society may think, ultimately weighing our own internal decision-making on what everyone else wants us to be, what we are “supposed” to be, doing things and making big decision because it’s “that time” instead of doing what we want and need individually. One of my fav quotes is… ‘Top many of us wake up and drive to jobs we hate in cars we can’t afford to buy shit we don’t need to impress people we don’t even like.’ I do all the time! We all do! Everyone of us in the world wants to be loved and important to someone else, we want to be needed and so on… Everything in life pretty much leads up to that- money, nice cars, clothes, status, Instagram likes and everything else seek out to achieve this false sense of true affection. Think for a second if you were on the world with 2-3 other people, and that’s it, there were 4 poeple in the whole world would anybody care about what car they had or what they wore or if those 3 people cared about their insta selfies. It’s all sort of funny to really analyze and think about. My advice and personal philosophy I constantly try to remind myself is to not force something that consistently makes you unhappy- something that makes you question ‘What’s in it for me?’. I’ll close out by saying don’t accept or mask what makes you happy, you can’t get it back, and our time is moving quick.

Life Control

Fight Club is not a film about fighting. It’s a narrative about life and getting rid of the corporate and cultural influences (or perhaps the confluence of the two) that control our lives. These are some of my favorite minimalist quotes from the film. The things you own end up owning you. It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything. You’re not your job. You’re not how much money you have in the bank. You’re not the car you drive. You’re not the contents of your wallet. You’re not your * khakis. You’re the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world. Reject the basic assumptions of civilization, especially the importance of material possessions. * off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns, I say never be complete, I say stop being perfect, I say let…lets evolve, let the chips fall where they may. The liberator who destroyed my property has realigned my perceptions. Do you know what a duvet is?…It’s a blanket. Just a blanket. Now why do guys like you and me know what a duvet is? Is this essential to our survival, in the hunter-gatherer sense of the word? No. What are we then?…We are consumers. We’re the byproducts of a lifestyle obsession. Murder, crime, poverty, these things don’t concern me. What concerns me are celebrity magazines, television with 500 channels, some guy’s name on my underwear. Rogaine, Viagra, Olestra…* Martha Stewart. Martha’s polishing the brass on the Titanic. It’s all going down, man. So * off with your sofa units and strine green stripe patterns. Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who’ve ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don’t need. We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war…our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off. What do you want? Wanna go back to the * job, * condo world, watching sitcoms? * you, I won’t do it. We are all part of the same compost heap. How embarrassing…a house full of condiments and no food. [Narrator, while looking at a Calvin Klein-esque ad on the bus] Is that what a real man is supposed to look like? * what you know. You need to forget about what you know, that’s your problem. Forget about what you think you know about life, about friendship, and especially about you and me. Hitting bottom isn’t a weekend retreat. It’s not a gd seminar. Stop trying to control everything and just let go! LET GO! Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing. Only after disaster can we be resurrected. Guys, what would you wish you’d done before you died? [After Raymond Hessel faces death but lives] Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day of Raymond K. Hessel’s life. His breakfast will taste better than any meal you and I have ever tasted. [Talking to himself about himself] Hey, you created me…take some responsibility! [Talking about Fight Club] And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight. GD! We just had a near-life experience, fellas. [Suggesting that most experiences are, by nature, dead.] Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. Time to stand up for what you believe in. If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don’t you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can’t think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you’re supposed to read? Do you think every thing you’re supposed to think? Buy what you’re told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you’re alive. If you don’t claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned. This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.